Lessons I Learned This Year
This year was a lot in many, many ways. I grabbed life by the horns, or I over-committed myself, or I packed my days filled with every possible thing, or I seized the day, or I failed in my obligations, or…
No matter how you phrase it, this year was jam-packed-busy in a way I could not have contemplated in 2020 when the world shut down.
Every aspect of my life—professional, personal, my writing, “fun,” parenthood, and so on—was full-throttle all year long, including our vacation. I had a long list of things I wanted to do, or intended to do, this year, and while many of them were crossed off, the list seems to continue on ad infinitum.
This is not a complaint: I could have said no (and, frankly, should have said no to many things). But five years after the start of the pandemic, I finally felt ready to dive back into life fully: with in-person work, with events, with friends, with family, with travel, with sailing… and here I am, the week before Christmas, having lived a very full life.
Here’s what I learned (as trite and obvious as some of these are!):
- It’s really, really important to say no. There are literal books on this topic but I’ve always hated saying no. I’ve done a good job about doing this when offered free items (you can read about my #gifted items policy here), but a frankly terrible job when it comes to my actual offline life. I need to start practicing!
- Standing up for yourself (and others) can be the most terrifying thing you’ve ever done, but it will also be the most important thing you do.
- Buy the best you can afford, and be completely in love with anything you bring into your home.
4. We’re always in a constant state of evolution, and complacency is the quickest way to ensure you’re going to have to give your closely-held beliefs a swift kick in the teeth.
5. Be nicer to others! The people this year who have done kind things for us have touched me in ways completely disproportionately to the small acts themselves.
6. Acknowledge happiness when it comes and hold it close.
7. Reciprocate the invitation! (Something I wasn’t great at this year, admittedly.)
8. A personal touch goes such a long way, even if it takes you more time. What are you rushing towards, anyway?
9. Minutiae tells the story. I was doing some research in the Columbia archives and the sheer amount of minutiae and marginalia told me infinitely more about the people and the stories I was researching (and those that I wasn’t!) than the staid record-keeping ever could.
10. Go for a walk!
11. And be sure to only wear really good, really comfortable shoes.
Happy holidays!
Where to Find Me
I post weekly-ish on Substack! In between, you can find outfit and home posts on my LTK page, pieces I’m loving here on ShopMy, and I have a large archive here on my blog, which you’re reading now. I’m also on Instagram here.
